This Crazy Life That I Live - Chapter One - Where Do I Begin?

This Crazy Life That I Live – Chapter One – Where Do I Begin?

I just finished watching the movie “Almost Famous,” the revealing movie about what it’s like to be on the road as a touring musician. It’s so honest in it’s portrayal of the touring lifestyle that it’s almost scary. Nothing like being on the road for a while to show you the most ugly and nasty sides of people and of the life we live.

And now I sit here alone in a house that’s not my own, on a couch that’s not like the one I own and in a neighborhood that I don’t know. Just two more weeks to go and then I finally get to go home for the winter months. I can’t wait. I may have chosen the life of a musical gypsy but I had no idea that it would ever feel like this and now I’m questioning why I’m putting myself through this mess. Is it really worth it? I was searching for those answers when I put on that movie tonight and now all I’ve got are a whole bunch of new questions.

I write to you from Seattle. Just another place to crash along the road, another couch to sleep on and another bunch of sleepless nights to get through. My suitcase rests in the corner of the room and my instruments beg to be played as they restlessly sleep in their unopened cases. I crave the familiar yet only the unfamiliar exists.

It’s 2am and I can’t sleep. Too many thoughts are rushing through my mind and I just wish the world would stop for a bit so that I could finally catch up and take a moment to breathe. There’s nowhere left to hide and nowhere left to run. I feel lost.

I quit smoking a few weeks back. Part of my goal to living a more healthy lifestyle yet I wish so badly that I had enough American money to buy a new pack so that I could just numb my mind for one more night and not have to deal with the current reality which faces me. I’m alone, I’m exhausted, I’m broke and my heart is so fucked up that I have no idea if I’ll ever be able to fix it. I can’t help thinking that this is the perfect moment to reflect and write about what’s happened over the past four months of touring on my own across Canada on that Greyhound bus. It’s been one hell of a long ride.

What you are about to read my friend is not going to be pretty nor will it be flattering in regards to the current state of our music industry. Not everyone is going to be happy with what I am about to share but those who get it will understand why I’m sharing it and they will admire my courage. Hopefully a few of us will even learn from it. Heck, I’m sure a lot of you will probably relate to a lot of the madness included in these pages. Eventually it’ll be included in the book that I am writing. Life has been that crazy and now its time to share it with you.

So where do I begin? Anyone who has spent lots of time on the road can relate to my current dilemma as I begin to type my thoughts out late into the night. I mean, is it a good idea to reveal the truth about what it’s like out there or should we keep it all a secret in order to avoid hurting anyone? I’ve decided to share it all because really, I have nothing to hide.

More to come…